That 70’s Fish

I welcomed a new member to the household Saturday. At the wedding reception, there were Bettas on some of the tables, and I brought one home.

I didn’t know if I’d ever get another fish after Pablo, and I sure wasn’t in any hurry to get one. But when I came home from work Monday afternoon and he was swimming around his bowl, I realized I had kinda missed that.

So without further adieu, I now present to you, for his first time ever on the internet, GabeKaplan:

(Photo courtesy of my Crackberry Curve.)

I know, I know, the first question many of you will have is going to be, “Fish at a reception?” And the answer is… apparently.

And I’m sure some of you are also wondering, “Why Gabe Kaplan?” First of all, Welcome Back Kotter is one of my all-time favorite shows. What other show dealt so candidly and humorously with issues facing inner city youth and had a sign in its credits that said, “Welcome to Brooklyn: The 4th Largest City In America?” I’ll tell you what other show. None!

Gabe Kaplan, the man not the fish, is an accomplished actor and comedian, as well as a world-renowned poker player and investment strategist. Not to mention he won the 2006 TVLand Award for Best Teacher. Now hopefully, little GabeKaplan can help bring to light some of big Gabe Kaplan’s accomplishments.

Also, I kind of like the thought of hanging out with GabeKaplan, watching the game with GabeKaplan, napping with GabeKaplan, and yes, eventually, dancing for GabeKaplan.

And sure, if Gabe Kaplan, the man, finds out I named my fish after him and is so honored that he decides he wants to meet me, send me every episode of Kotter on DVD, or stake me in the 2008 World Series Of Poker, well then, who am I to object.

Who knows, me and GabeKaplan might even wind up being BFF’s.

Wonder if he knows whatever happened to Epstein.

“Who’d have thought they’d lead ya, back here where we need ya? Yeah, we tease him a lot cos we’ve got him on the spot. Welcome back…”

Remembering Pablo…

We are here today to celebrate the life of Pablo Picasso, the famed Betta fish. Pablo died Monday, July 9, 2007, of unknown causes. His age was at least twenty-six months. He will be mourned by many.

Though Pablo’s exact origins are unknown, his owner liked to claim he was born near the equator, in the tropical waters around Borneo. Mistakenly named after the famed Spanish painter Pablo Picasso, due to his lack of any visible ears, the little blue Betta was destined for greatness.

The first known recorded sighting of Pablo was in the Fish Bowl region of Wal-Mart, where he spent many mostly boring days. After escaping from there with most of his youth still intact, Pablo moved into an apartment in May of 2005. A few short months later, he moved again, this time into the two-bedroom-one-bath bachelor paradise where he would spend the rest of his days.

Originally intended to be nothing more than a Mother’s Day present, Pablo used his charm to convince his owner to keep him. Hopelessly attached to the little feller after only a few hours, Pablo’s owner would go out and buy another Betta and another aquarium to be given for the Mother’s Day gift.

Often lauded by his owner as the “most handsome fish in the world,” Pablo developed many talents, such as being able to hear footsteps on the stairs, and looking irresistibly cute.

Pablo was a fun-loving fish whose preferred pasttimes included swimming, eating, and napping. He also seemed fascinated by the television and watching his owner dance. Pablo did not appear to be a fan of car rides or cameras. Some of his favorite things were Betta Gold pellets and distilled water, and he was known to occasionally nibble on a Fruity Pebble.

Pablo was a friend and a companion. A pet in a place where no pets were allowed. He brought life, warmth, and laughter to his home. His passing leaves a huge void. And he will be missed always.

Sam

We said goodbye to an old friend today.

Sam has been part of our family for many years. We got him a couple of years before I moved away from home. Since I wasn’t allowed to have pets where I moved, Sam remained at Dad’s until my sister got married three years ago, when he went to live with her.

My sister called me today crying, telling me she thought Sam was dying. Since I had to work, I called Dad to see if he would go over there and check on the dog and my sister.

I won’t go into details, but Dad said he thought Sam had a stroke. He took him to the vet, and Sam was put down this afternoon.

I went over to my sister’s this evening, figuring she could use some company. I got there after 9:00, and her eyes were still puffy and swollen. We sat out by the pool and talked for an hour and a half, a little about Sam, but mostly about anything else, to try and keep her mind off of it. She took good care of Sam, and I told her that.

By all familial accounts, Sam was fourteen. I last saw him a couple of weeks ago. He was moving slowly and sleeping a lot, but he let me brush him for a few minutes. I prefer to remember his younger years.

One of his favorite games was getting out of the yard and wandering thru the neighborhood, marking his territory and “talking” to the other dogs. Almost everytime, my sister or I would have to go literally pick him up and carry him home.

Then there was his idiosyncratic two-week kibbles-only phase, where he’d pick every single kibble out of his bowl, leaving only the bits. We were about to try changing to another brand of dog food when Sam suddenly went back to eating normally again.

Dogs are a true joy. They’re always excited to see you and loyal beyond compare. They become like part of the family. Losing one is tough.

I had a friend whose dog got run over several years ago. I’d never seen this guy show the slightest hint of emotion, ever. But when I asked about his dog, he was unable to speak about it.

Sam always seemed to be terrified of fireworks. He would whine and go hide in his house anytime anyone was shooting them. I suppose it’s good he won’t have to endure another 4th of July.

I’ll miss you, ol’ buddy. And thank God for dogs.