Nocturnal recurrences

Tried to make the title of this post alluring, as the post itself…

I had one of my most common recurring dreams last night. No, it’s not the underwear dream. I guess since I pretty much run around the house in my underwear all the time, and even take the trash out to the dumpster in my underwear, that isn’t so much a dream anymore as it is reality.

No, last night I dreamed that it was Christmas Eve and I hadn’t bought anyone anything. It was only a couple of hours until the first family gathering, and I didn’t have time to buy gifts.

I’ve had this dream or something very similar to it several times. It has become my most common recurring dream. I don’t remember having it until the last year or so.

It isn’t always exactly the same. Sometimes I go try to buy something at the last minute and all the stores are closed. Sometimes I have a day or two before Christmas. I go to the store but can’t find anything good. I wander around on the verge of panicking, feeling sadness and angst. And end up buying gifts for my family that I know they don’t want.

The odd thing is, my family always goes overboard for Christmas. It comes from my Mom. It’s her favorite holiday and she always buys too much. And by too much, I mean just enough (if you’re reading this, Mom.) I’ve even had ex-girlfriends say half-jokingly that they missed dating me around Christmas, because Mom would go overboard with them, too.

My sister and I inherited her love of Christmas and tendency to buy lots of presents. And while I love going shopping on Christmas Eve simply for the atmosphere of it all, I’ve never waited until the last minute to start, or been in danger of not having my gifts bought.

I wonder what the dream means. I have it year round, not just near the holidays, so I don’t think there’s a literal interpretation. And while it’s not exactly the same everytime, it always makes me feel unprepared, anxious, and upset.

This morning, I woke up with a headache and realized I had a migraine that apparently started while I was asleep. Surely a dream couldn’t cause a migraine? I also woke up with a scrape on the back on one of my fingers. What am I doing at night? Maybe I should set up a video camera. No, I don’t already have one set up!

What recurring dream do you have?

“Said that she go back to school and try things once again. But you know it didn’t take too long till she lost her way…”